After running roughshod over not-too-elite competition in Australia and getting their asses handed to them by excellent professional teams in Serbia, Smart Gilas took its act to the United States to play several minor league teams from the American Basketball Association. A couple of days ago, Gilas began its campaign by going up against the ABA team based in San Diego (which of course in German means whale’s vagina). It was an exciting match, with birthday boy Mark Barroca sinking a three-point shot with 4.3 seconds left to lead the Filipinos to a 94-93 victory.

But what really caught my eye from this game report by Joey Villar at the Philippine Star was this last line: “If plans don’t miscarry, Smart Gilas will be the second foreign squad to be included in next year’s ABA season as an adopted team by Daly City, next to China’s Beijing Aoshen, headed by former LA Lakers’ guard Sun Yue.”

This would be a good thing, if this were the ABA of Julius Erving and Connie Hawkins, but it’s not. Not even close. It’s like comparing the handsomeness of Chris Tiu to Barroca. It’s laughable.

There are actually several minor leagues in the United States apart from the NBA D-League, such as the Premiere Basketball League (PBL), where current Talk N Text import Shawn Daniels played before his latest PBA stint, and the International Basketball League (IBL), which is home to the likes of former Red Bull import Adam Parada.

So just how bad is the ABA? Scott Schroeder of the excellent D-League blog Ridiculous Upside wrote about the league last year, while discussing Sun Yue and Beijing Aoshen:

The Aoshen, AKA Aoshen Olympian, play in the ABA, which, in its current state, is not exactly a good league. Ever heard of the PBL? It's way below that. IBL? Probably even a bit below that. The ABA is disgusting.

Strong words. But hey, at least Aoshen got to play in the ABA and Sun Yue was drafted by the Lakers, right? But as Schroeder points out in his piece, Sun sucked balls: “In four games in the D-League, the Chinese Magic Johnson didn't impress. Honestly, I'm shocked that he was drafted by the Lakers, as in the three games I saw him play, it looked he belonged back in the ABA with his Chinese traveling team, the Beijing Aoshen.” There are whispers that the only reason he got on the Lakers was because of his marketing value as a Chinese national.

But the terrible state of the league isn’t just because of the inferior talent level, but because of how poorly-run the league is, with teams pulling in and out of the league during the season. From 2001 to 2008, “over 170 teams have folded disbanded, or fallen into a state of disrepair.” The league is a joke, and it is actually being used by sports editors in US cities for comic relief:

In doing this story there were some interesting tales that were uncovered and one of the best is about coach came into New Jersey with only four players so he asked where the local YMCA was and 'recruited three or four players' for that one night.

A Rochester executive (Rochester, like Halifax quit the A.B.A. last year just before the playoffs) told me that one team had six players and a '13th man'. That is a home town person who may get into a game towards the very end of the contest.

"But in this case the 13th man was used almost as a regular since they simply didn't have any players. It was pathetic," the executive told TSN.ca

The ever-changing lineup of teams has taken its toll on the league, and the mental health of the people involved in it, according to OurSports Central:

Though every team is supposed to play a 36-game slate, the league has played less than half its scheduled games to this point, and more than 100 additional games will be cancelled because of the teams that are no longer playing. Other teams have cancelled games without explanation. Additionally, several dozen more contests were never scheduled, and teams have resorted to playing semi-pro or amateur teams to fill their home dates. The Atlanta Vision for instance, has played just three ABA games and have only 12 more scheduled against league opposition.

In an email sent to [ABA CEO Joe] Newman and the ABA office, Texas Tycoons General Manager Mike Senters expressed his frustration with the constantly eroding schedule. "What are we actually selling to the public? Fast paced, fan friendly, affordable, cancellations?" he asked, while noting he wanted the league to improve.

Aoshen joined the ABA in 2005, playing its home games in California (while driving former Suns forward Paul Shirley, who had a short stint with the team, damn near crazy). In 2007, the team decided to move its home games to Singapore, flying their opposition halfway around the world. The accommodations were less than ideal:

Houston Takers owner Larry Leonard blamed the mildew-ridden hotel in which his team stayed after several of his players became ill. Others cited a different distraction.

“Our hotel was small and cramped,” said Maywood (Cal.) Buzz General Manager Burrell Lee. “There were hookers everywhere, knocking on our door in the hotel.”

Perhaps this note on OurSports Central about the ABA says it best about the prospects of the league: “OurSports Central no longer actively covers the American Basketball Association (ABA) as a professional league due in part to its inability to publish and play a schedule and the transitory nature of many of its teams.”

Funnily enough, last December 2009, the ABA announced an ambitious $200-million global expansion program led by Paul Monozca, a Filipino based in Singapore who calls himself a “sports philantrophist.” It is through Monozca’s roots that Smart Gilas is now playing in the ABA. At the start of the Gilas trip, he announced, “The Smart-Gilas team's debut in the ABA is a historic one. The country has been dreaming of playing pro basketball in the United States, same as teams from all over the world. Today, the dream has become a reality. ABA Global is here.”

After everything you just read about the ABA, would you still believe this man?